[Captioning sponsored by THE U.S. DEPARTMENT OF EDUCATION
and NICKELODEON]
AH...
AN AFTERNOON OF PURE, UNINTERRUPTED LEISURE.
DOG, THIS IS WHAT A CAT LIVES FOR.
IF YOU SAY SO, CAT.
OH, I DO, I DO.
THE PHONE IS UNPLUGGED, SO IS THE TV, AND...
PLUGGED IN, HUH?
( imitating ): HEH-HEH-HEH.
HEY, CATBUTT, OPEN UP.
IT'S CLIFF.
UM, UH, CLIFF, IT'S MY DAY OFF
AND DOG AND I WERE JUST RELAXING SO, WE...
NOT ANYMORE YOU AIN'T.
THIS HERE'S MY NIECE.
HI, LITTLE BABY.
COOCHIE-COOCHIE-COO.
YOW!
LUBE WAS SUPPOSED TO BABY-SIT HER
BUT HE GOT HIS HEAD STUCK IN A BICYCLE.
THAT'S, THAT'S REALLY FASCINATING BUT I, UH...
I WANT YOU TO BABY-SIT HER INSTEAD.
DO ME THAT PERSONAL-TYPE FAVOR
I WON'T POUND YOU FOR A MONTH.
AND IF I REFUSE?
THEN I POUND YOU RIGHT NOW.
WELL THEN, JUST CALL ME NANNY.
HI, LITTLE NANNY.
HEY, I THINK YOUSE
ARE REALLY GOING TO HIT IT OFF.
SHE'S GOT A REAL THING FOR KITTY CATS.
KITTY CAT!
BE A GOOD LITTLE GIRL
AND LET KITTY CAT GO.
( crashing ) OW!
HERE COMES UNCLE CLIFFY.
HERE COMES UNCLE DOGGY.
HERE COMES UNCLE CATTY.
SHEESH, YOU GET THE LICENSE PLATE
ON THE ATOM BOMB THAT HIT THIS PLACE?
WE'RE BABY-SITTING CLIFF'S NIECE, WINSLOW.
YEAH?
SO, UH, WHERE IS THE LITTLE TYKE?
HUH?
SHE'S GONE!
HEY, UM, IT'S, UH...
I FORGET MY NAME.
( screams ): IT'S LUBE!
OH, YEAH.
UM, AND I COME TO TAKE OVER THE BABY-SITTING, ON ACCOUNT OF
I GOT MY HEAD UN-STUCK FROM THE BICYCLE.
OH, MY GOSH, MY GOSH.
WHEN LUBE SEES I LOST THE BABY
HE'LL TELL CLIFF.
AND I'LL BE DEAD CAT MEAT!
( snickers ) TOUGH BREAK, CAT.
SO, UH, CAN I HAVE YOUR TV?
WAIT A MINUTE.
YOU'RE JUST ABOUT THE RIGHT SIZE.
FOR WHAT?
W-WHOA!
HEY! I AIN'T PRETENDING TO BE NO...
COOCHIE-COO
LITTLE BABY.
HEY, I AIN'T NO...
I'LL GET YOU FOR THIS, CAT.
SHE'S GETTING MORE LIKE CLIFF
ALL THE TIME.
YOU'RE A GENIUS, CAT.
ALL OUR WORRIES ARE OVER.
WHAT ARE YOU TALKING ABOUT?
WE STILL HAVE TO FIND CLIFF'S NIECE
AND SWITCH HER WITH WINSLOW
BEFORE CLIFF GETS HOME!
OH, YEAH.
CAT!
THAT INNOCENT BABY IS OUT THERE
IN THE BIG, BAD WORLD, ALL ALONE.
WE MUST FIND THE BABY
BEFORE ANY HARMS COME TO HER.
OR ME.
LET ME OUT OF HERE, YOU BIG DOPE.
UM, I THINK SOMEBODY'S CRANKY
ON ACCOUNT OF NOT EATING.
HERE, BABY.
A NICE JAR, UM...
OF STUFF TO EAT.
WHAT, ARE YOU NUTS?
NO WAY I'M EATING KIDDY GARBAGE.
OPEN UP FOR LUBEY.
COMING IN THE GARAGE.
HUH, NOT BAD.
KIND OF TASTY, IN FACT.
KEEP IT COMING, SERVANT BOY.
GETTING CLOSER, CAT.
( giggles ) KITTY CAT.
WHAT IS IT, BOY?
( coaxing ): WELL, HELLO THERE, LITTLE MISS.
WHY DON'T YOU WADDLE OVER HERE
AND PLAY WITH UNCLE CAT?
OOH! WHY, YOU LITTLE...
KITTY CAT.
( stammering ): C-COME ON, BABY.
IT'S TIME TO GO.
DOG?
LEROY!
AH, LEROY... MY MAIN MAN.
GIVE ME SOME OF THAT.
YOU STILL HANGING AROUND WITH CAT?
I'M KIDDING YOU, I'M KIDDING YOU.
AND SO THEM BEARS DID SOMETHING
AND BLONDE GIRL DID SOMETHING
AND THEY LIV-ED HAPPY FOREVER, UM, A LONG TIME.
TIME.
HEY, HEY, GETTING A LITTLE LAZY
WITH THE ROCKING, AIN'T YOU?OH, SORRY.
YEAH, WELL, SHAPE UP
OR I'LL TELL MY UNCLE CLIFFY.
NOW, LET'S HAVE A NEW STORY.
AND, WHILE WE'RE ON THE SUBJECT
HOW'S ABOUT FRESHENING UP MY MILK?
UH, OKAY, BABY.
PARTY'S OVER, MISSY.
TERRIFIC.
DOG, I DON'T THINK WE'LL EVER FIND
THAT LITTLE BUNDLE OF JOY.
CAT! LOOK!
IT'S BABY!
OH, NO, CAT.
HOW WILL WE EVER CATCH THAT SPEEDING TRUCK?
CATDOG WHEEL!
KEEP ROLLING, DOG!
IT'S CLIFF!
WE'RE RUNNING OUT OF TIME.
WE HAVE TO FIND THE BABY
AND GET HER BACK TO CLIFF'S HOUSE
BEFORE HE GETS HOME.
CAT! LOOK!
SHE LEFT A TRAIL OF ICE CREAM WRAPPERS.
INTERESTING.
SENOR FROSTY.
Cat ( whispers ): PERFECT, IT'S NAP TIME.
HEY, WHAT'S THE BIG IDEA?
SHH! WE'RE GETTING YOU OUT OF HERE.
I DON'T WANT TO.
WHAT DO YOU MEAN?
I LIKE IT HERE.
I GET THREE HOTS AND A COT
THE BIG GOON TREATS ME LIKE A KING.
HE EVEN READS ME STORIES.
WELL, TOUGH KITTIES.
WE'RE GOING HOME.
WINSLOW, PLEASE.
CLIFF WILL BE BACK ANY SECOND.
OKAY, I'LL COME WITH YOU
ON ONE CONDITION.
OH, NO, NO.
I'M SICK OF THAT SONG, CAT.
HOW'S ABOUT A STORY?
AND SOME MORE STRAINED PEACHES.
AND WARM ME UP ANOTHER BOTTLE OF MILK.
YOU SURE MAKE A GOOD BABY-SITTER, CAT.
WHAT A GREAT YARN BALL!
MMM... WHAT A JOY IT IS TO BE A CAT.
DO YOU ALWAYS HAVE TO BE
SUCH A DOG?
WHAT DID YOU SAY, CAT?
Calling all cats.
Join the Cat Club.
If you are a cat
you belong.
HMM...
I'M NOT GOING TO A STUPID CAT CLUB.
COME ON, DOG.
I NEED TO BE WITH MY OWN KIND
ONCE IN A WHILE.
WE'LL ONLY STAY A FEW MINUTES.
BUT IT SAYS "CATS ONLY."
NOT TO WORRY.
I DON'T WANT TO BE A CAT.
HOW DO YOU KNOW TILL YOU'VE TRIED?
YOU MIGHT LIKE IT.
OUCH.
THANK GOODNESS FOR THOSE ORIGAMI LESSONS.
HMM...
THAT NOSE WON'T DO.
YOU'LL PASS.
NOW JUST STICK CLOSE TO ME, AND IF ANYONE TALKS TO YOU
WHAT ARE YOU GOING TO SAY?
MEOW.
PERFECT.
WELL, GOOD EVENING, FELLOW CATS.
WE'RE JUST A COUPLE OF CATS
HERE TO JOIN THE CAT CLUB.
MEOW.
HMM, I NEVER SEEN A CAT
LIKE THAT BEFORE.
HE'S A VERY RARE BREED.
HE'S A... EAST MORAVIAN... MARONI.
WELL! WHY DIDN'T YOU SAY SO?
COME ON IN!
GOOD EVENING, GENTLEMEN.
I'M FELEEN.
HELLO-O-O.
MY NAME'S CAT, AND THIS IS
MY FRIEND DO... DOUG.
DOUG.
( moans ): MEOW.
CAN I GET YOU A YARN BALL?
A DRY SPOT IN THE
LITTER LOUNGE?
A TABLE IN THE MILK BAR?
HOW ABOUT A TASTY FRESH FISH JUICE?
YUCK.
TUNA? SALMON?
SUSHI?
OH, WHY, THANK YOU.
UH... DOUG.
EW... I HATE FISH.
UM, HE'S KIDDING.
WHAT A FUNSTER.
HE'S A NUT!
DOG, UH, DOUG LOVES FISH.
I THINK I'M GOING TO BARF.
I WANT TO GO.
YOU SAID WE'D ONLY STAY
FOR A FEW MINUTES.
OH, YOU CAN'T GO YET.
YOU HAVEN'T SEEN YOUR UNIFORMS.
UNIFORMS?
OH, DO YOU HAVE HATS?
IS THERE A HAT?
I LOVE HATS.
BRING ON THE CHAPEAUS.
ME-OW!
NOW, JOIN US IN OUR INNER SANCTUM...
THE SACRED CAVE OF CATS.
SHH!
SHHH...!
ME-WOW.
THAT WAS BEAUTIFUL!
I LOVE YOU GUYS.
GREETINGS, FELLOW FELINES.
PLEASE LOWER THE MASK OF UNITY.
WE WELCOME OUR TWO NEWEST MEMBERS
CAT AND DOUG.
HAIL CAT AND DOUG.
AND NOW, A FILM YOU WILL ALL FIND VERY ILLUMINATING.
ROLL IT, LENNY.
OH, BOY, A FREE MOVIE.
THIS IS A GREAT CLUB, CAT.
TOLD YOU SO.
Cats, the proud
the brave
the intelligent.
Superior.
The cat, wonder of wonders.
AH...
The greatest creature on earth.
AIN'T IT THE TRUTH.
But alas, the beloved cat has an evil enemy.
the cause of all our problems...
the dog.
Despicable, inferior creatures
not fit to walk this earth.
BUT NOT ANYMORE.
A NEW DAY IS DAWNING.
WE WILL ACHIEVE OUR ULTIMATE DREAM
A WORLD WITHOUT DOGS!
NO MORE DOGS!
DOG— DOUG, WHAT ARE YOU SAYING?
I'M SAYING, "NO MORE DOGS!"
HERE IS HOW WE WILL
THE DOGCATCHER XL5!
IT WILL ELIMINATE DOGS!
AND ANYONE WHO ASSOCIATES WITH DOGS!
NO MORE DOGS!
DOG, THIS IS A BAD CLUB.
WE'VE GOT TO GET OUT OF HERE.
THESE CATS ARE CRAZY.
NO MORE DOGS!
DOG, DOG, DOG, DOG, DOG.
YOU'RE A DOG.
NO MORE DOGS...!
WAIT!
SOMEONE HERE HAS THE FOUL STENCH
OF DOG UPON THEM!
WHO HAS BEEN ASSOCIATING WITH A DOG?
OH, I KNOW, I KNOW!
PICK ME!
PICK ME! PICK ME!
DOG! DOG!
WHAT?
IT IS... HIM.
TRAITOR!
AND WHO WAS THE DOG... DOUG?
IT WAS ME!
DESTROY THAT CAT, AND THE DOG HE DRAGGED IN.
DESTROY THAT CAT AND THE D... OOPS.
AFTER THEM!
WELL, DOG... WE LEARNED A VALUABLE LESSON TODAY.
DON'T JOIN A CLUB JUST 'CAUSE IT LOOKS COOL.
RIGHT!
CAN I KEEP THE HAT?
Crowd ( chanting ): CATDOG, CATDOG...!
NOW, REMEMBER, DOG, FOLLOW MY LEAD.
WHEN I SAY "CAT DIGGETY DOG," YOU SAY "CAT DIGG..."
OKAY!
TERRIFIC.
I CAN'T IMAGINE.
DOG, WILL YOU WATCH...
♪ WHEN WE SCRATCH AND BITE
CAN I GET YOU A TOWEL?
NEVER MIND.
♪ WE'RE BACON AND EGGS
♪ THAT'S SCRAMBLED EGGS
♪ MY ARMS ARE HIS LEGS
WHEW!
♪ YOU KNOW, TWO HEADS
STOP, STOP, STOP, STOP!
OH-HO, THAT'S FUNNY.
THOSE ARE NOT THE RIGHT WORDS.
Audience ( chanting ): CATDOG, CATDOG, CATDOG...!
[Captioning sponsored by THE U.S. DEPARTMENT OF EDUCATION
and NICKELODEON ]