So, danny.
You and your little friends
Want to hunt ghosts.
Uh, actually, dad,
I want to be an astronaut.
Sorry, mr. Fenton.
I was into ghosts,
But they're so mainstream now.
They're like cell phones.
Waste these looks and all this charisma
Hunting ghosts? Criminal.
Well, if you do want to hunt ghosts,
There are a few things you need to learn.
Oh, no.
This isn't good.
True, i've never seen a ghost,
But when i do, i'll be prepared,
And so will you,
Whether you want to be or not.
It all starts with your equipment.
Sam, tucker, this is the fenton thermos.
It's supposed to trap ghosts.
But since it doesn't work,
And it's just a thermos,
A thermos with the word "fenton" in front of it.
And that? That is the fenton portal.
It releases ghosts into our world,
Whether i want it to or not.
Someday, i'll figure out how that works, too.
Now, who wants to hunt some ghosts?
You kids. Look at you.
You're too excited to speak.
So i'll just go on speaking.
I was born many years ago
In a log cabin in the woods.
I don't exactly remember where, but i do know i wanted a pony.
Never got the pony.
As a matter of fact, we had to eat horsemeat
During the war.
I had a problem with that.
Aah!
Ok, two more days and it's done.
What did you say? It's done?
The fentonfinder is done.
This baby uses satellites to lead you right to the ghosts.
It uses what to track what?
Computerized voice: welcome to the fentonfinder.
A ghost is near. Walk forward.
Ghost located. Thank you for using the fentonfinder.
What? That can't be right.
Actually, i need to tell you guys something.
That's not all you need, danny.
You need guidance,
And parents who can provide it.
Sweetie, i know what we do
Doesn't make sense sometimes,
But you're only—
16. Biologically.
But psychologically, i'm an adult,
And i will not allow
You insane obsession with ghosts
To pollute the mind of this impressionable little child.
Come, you abused, unwanted wretch.
I'll drive you to school.
Huh. That's weird.
Jasmine never offers to drive danny to school.
That can only mean one thing.
That's not our daughter.
That's a ghost.
Danny, no! It's a trap!
I think i should tell them.
Why? Parents don't listen.
Even worse, they don't understand.
Why can't they accept me for who i am?
Sam, i'm talking about my powers.
My problems.
Oh, right. Me, too.
It's been a month since the accident,
And i still barely have any control.
If somebody catches me, i go from geek to freak around here.
Kind of like what you're doing now?
Aah!
Darn it!
If my dad can invent something
That accidentally made me half-Ghost,
Why can't he invent something
That turns me back to normal?
Danny, your powers make you unique.
Unique is good.
That's why i'm an ultra recyclo-Vegetarian.
Which means what?
She doesn't eat anything with a face on it.
Oh, who cares about that stuff?
Meat connoisseur.
Last night,
You had sloppy joes.
Impressive.
Meat heightens the senses,
And my all-Meat streak is 14 years strong.
And it's about to end.
The school board finally agreed to try
A new cafeteria menu.
I wore them down.
Wait. What did you do?
What is this? Grass on a bun?
What have you done?
Tucker, it's time for a change.
Ooh! Somebody changed the menu!
Maybe this is a bad idea.
No, it's perfect.
When jazz gets home,
We suck the ghost out of her
With a fenton xtractor.
But what if jazz isn't a ghost?
What if we accidentally hurt her?
Maddie, the fenton xtractor doesn't hurt humans.
Unless it gets in your hair.
Aah!
See?
Don't you think this is a little extreme, sam?
Ah, miss manson.
The school board wanted me
To personally thank you
For ushering in this welcome experiment to our cafeteria.
Meat. Near.
No, no. The rumors about
The new all-Steak buffet
In the teachers' lounge are completely untrue.
Thanks again.
Yeah. Thanks again for making us eat garbage, sam.
It's not garbage. It's recyclable organic matter.
Danny and tucker: it's garbage.
Uh, guys, i've got a problem. Aah!
Fenton!
Make that two problems.
I ordered 3 mud pies.
Do you know what they gave me?
3 mud pies.
With mud. From the ground!
All because of your girlfriend.
She's not my girlfriend.
I'm not his girlfriend.
Uh—aah!
These are the best years of my life.
After high school, it's all downhill for me.
How am i supposed to enjoy my glory days eating mud?
Actually, it's topsoil.
Whatever!
Eat it. All of it.
Uh...
Garbage fight!
It's not garbage, it's—
You're gonna pay for this, fenton!
Great. I'm still his favorite.
Huh. Shouldn't be so bad.
She looks a little like my grandmother.
Shouldn't she be haunting a bingo hall?
Hello, children. Can you help me?
Today's lunch is meatloaf,
But i don't see the meatloaf.
Did someone change the menu?
Yeah. She did.
You changed the menu?
Aah!
The menu has been the same for 50 years.
Get behind me.
Wow. I feel safe.
I'm going ghost!
I command you to go away.
Well, if this superhero thing doesn't work out,
I can have an exciting career as a busboy.
I control lunch.
Lunch is sacred.
Lunch has rules.
Anybody want cake?
Too bad.
Children who change my menu
Do not get dessert.
Hey, it worked!
This is the thanks i get
For thinking like an individual?
Steak. Rib eye.
No, porterhouse. Medium rare.
But where did it come from?
Lancer.
Esteemed casper high faculty,
I present your all-Steak
Buffet.
Paradise lost!
Prepare to learn why meat
Is the most powerful of the 5 food groups.
Cookie?
Then perish!
Forget it!
The only thing that has an expiration date here
Is you!
Whoops.
I didn't mean to do that.
Ooh!
Come on! Change back! We gotta go!
You two aren't going anywhere.
Told you you'd pay, fenton,
Tucker foley.
Chronic tardiness. Talking in class.
Repeated loitering by the girls' locker room.
Danny fenton.
34 dropped beakers in the last month.
Banned for life from handling
All fragile school property,
But no severe mischief before today.
So, gentlemen, tell me.
Why did the two of you
Conspire to destroy the school's cafeteria?
Dash started it. He threw—
4 touchdown passes in the last game.
Is thereby exempt from scorn.
You two, however, are not.
I'll map out your punishment when i return.
Mr. Baxter, watch the door.
We gotta find sam.
For some reason, i feel like i got her kidnapped.
Maybe because you told the ghost
She changed the menu?
How about that?
That steak is still in the building.
200 yards, tops.
Check it out. Meat trail.
Whoa!
Gentlemen, your punishment will be—
Worse than you can imagine.
Sweet mother of mutton!
I dreamed of it, but i never thought
I'd live to see it.
How is it that i have the ghost powers
And you're the weird kid?
My dear child, meat is good for kids.
It helps them grow and makes them smile.
Why won't you eat it?
We don't need meat. That's fact.
Silence!
You need discipline, manners, respect.
You know where that comes from?
Meat!
Chicken or fish?
I'll take care of the ghost.
You just find a way to get sam out of that pile of meat.
Way ahead of you.
I'll have you free in no time, sam.
You've gotta be kidding me.
Don't you see?
This is why you need meat.
You're skin and bones.
Help's on the way, buddy!
Run?
Run.
Whoa!
Gee, danny. Fighting meat monsters,
Flying through walls.
You must be exhausted.
What? Of course not.
What would give you that idea?
Mom? Dad?
Now, maddie! Hit her! I'm movin' in!
Get my back!
This is all going in the memoir.
Hey, mr. And mrs. Fenton.
What a school day.
Poor danny nodded off.
We figured we'd just carry him all the way home
And tuck him into bed
Without any parental interaction whatsoever.
Don't get up. We know where to go. Bye!
Hmm.
Jack, danny is not a ghost.
You're right.
Jazz is.
Aah! Aah! Wha? What's going on?
You passed out. We took you home.
You've been asleep for 4 days.
4 days?
Ha ha ha. Nah.
It's only been a couple hours.
Knock it off, tucker.
This is the second time today
Your carelessness almost got him killed.
Me? I almost got him killed?
The only reason this happened
Is because you had to be unique.
You had to take the meat away,
And i'm going to get it back.
You want to change that menu back?
You're going to have to go through me to do it!
Oh well. I'm sure everything will be
Back to normal by tomorrow.
Or not. Maybe it'll be worse.
What do we want?
Meat!
When do we want it?
Now!
Veggies now! Veggies forever!
You guys put together 2 protests in one night?
Meat eaters, danny.
Always ready to fight,
And our high-Protein diets
Give us the energy we need to do it quickly.
Ultra recyclo-Vegetarians
Are always ready to protest.
And because we don't have to waste time cooking our food,
We can move even faster.
Don't you guys think this is a little extreme?
No choice, buddy.
You're either with me,
Or you're against him.
Sam and tucker: so whose side are you on?
It's lunchtime!
Meat, why have you betrayed me?
Guys, time to make up. Now!
Spike, you have to open up to your parents.
Be true to yourself and them.
Tell them how you feel.
I mean, it's not like they're gonna attack you or anything.
Aah!
I've got her, and the fenton grappler
Is working like a charm.
I don't understand.
If jazz is a ghost,
Why isn't she phased through the net?
Because i am not a ghost!
You ambushed me,
Suffocated me with smoke,
And worse, i was pulled away from spike
Before he had his breakthrough!
What do you have to say for yourselves?
Eat hot fenton thermos, ghost gal!
Hmm. Darn thing still doesn't work.
He really is getting better.
I sure hope he can take a punch.
There's your water, sir.
Thanks!
I, jack fenton, from this day forward,
Do hereby turn my back on ghosts.
Lunch lady: oh, dear.
What a mess.
Are you ok?
Yeah, i think so.
Tough, because you being ok
Is not part of my balanced diet of doom.
Wasn't expecting that. Or that.
Aah!
And this thermos can't trap ghosts
Because ghosts don't exist.
The fenton thermos.
But how am i going to get it to work?
Aah!
Change back. Change back!
Thanks for the thermos!
Ha! Ghost kid! I was right!
Ha ha ha. I never doubted for a second.
Ha ha ha ha—
No!
Soup's not on today's menu!
I'm changing the menu, permanently.
Please work.
I hope i'm right!
Nooo!
What happened?
Where's the ghost?
My parents have their moments.
Voice of fentonfinder: ghost directly ahead.
You would have to be some sort of moron
To not notice the ghost directly ahead.
Oh, sorry, dad. You just missed him.
We got a runner.
Great. Back to square one.
So you're not gonna tell 'em?
Nah.
I think i might've finally figured out
What these powers are for.
They make me—
In a world of trouble.
Manson, pick up that t-Bone.
With my hands?
Foley, pick up that turfwich.
With my hands?
Fenton, a little help?
Whatever you say, dash.
Whatever you say.