What are you doing?
Eating cereal.
I got us a chicken for dinner.
Chicken? Seriously?
You're not gonna be hungry now.
You're doing it all wrong, again, as usual.
I'm not. I'm cutting from the media steinum out.
You can't see the media steinum without your glasses.
Damn. Where are my glasses?
No, put it down. Put it down.
Right here. Right here.
Move.
What would I do without you?
Starve.
Damsel in distress.
Come on.
Put her on a monitor, order a portable chest. Gonna cut your top.
Between my ninth and tenth intercostal spaces.
No hemo or pneumothorax, vitals are stable. Pull it.
- I wouldn't. - Mind your business.
- Who is this guy? - Get this thing out of me.
I screwed up in front of the chief.
I messed up a suture and now he's looking at me like I am number 12.
Mer, please, no one gets to see me like this. OK?
Yang! What the hell happened? Get her on a monitor,
- order a portable chest... - I did.
- Check her respiratory funct... - I did. See?
Breath sounds clear and equal.
Quiet. What would you advise as course of treatment?
We leave it in until we get the chest X-ray and CT back.
- I'm fine. - What about infection? This is melting
- dirty roof water into her body. - Pull it out!
Leave it. You get stabbed in the chest, lucky enough to still be breathing,
you leave the knife in until you figure out what's going on. Leave it.
- Take it out. - Leave it.
Since you know so much, teach your interns to treat you.
This is an opportunity to get back to the basics.
I need to check on Vincent Kenner.
Kenner is your responsibility now.
Bear in mind he is my patient, and I am not about to lose
another trauma case today. Keep that man alive.
Can I get a word with you, Dr. Hunt?
Think you'll be able to restore her memory?
I was able to suction blood and remove the pressure.
Hopeful. Not certain, but hopeful.
Fifteen blade, please. Ow!
- Something wrong, Dr. Shepherd? - Oh, my God.
Dr. Hahn asked about teaching before.
When you get a surgeon a blade, make sure it's handle first.
Suction the bleeders while I clean and get a glove.
- He's really gonna be OK? - Except for his voice.
His abdomen's definitely tender. He needs another CT.
Michael, the insurance, it's a mistake, right?
It's gotta be a mistake. Write down a name and a number and I'll fix it.
Everything will be fine, right?
Everything's gonna be fine?
Maybe later would be better.
Sarabeth, come on, honey.
- What's going on? - We're going ahead with the freezing.
Without my consent? No, I don't think so.
Wanna be the doctor who doesn't give his all to keep
- a man from being wheelchair-bound? - Get out!
Don't take orders from civilians.
- You arrogant... - Shepherd.
Now this patient is stable, he may never walk.
If you try this, he could throw a clot, have organ failure and die.
We're going ahead with the freezing.
Ever since this morning, you've been pissing on everything with a pulse
trying to prove you're not number 12.
And you're not.
But right now, with this decision, you act like number 12.
Good luck with the patient, Dr. Torres.
The chief's under the spell of some insane man in camouflage.
He saved my patient's life. He'll never talk again but, still, life saved.
What happened to your hand?
Scalpel. Rose. Not intentional.
She's a dead mouse on the kitchen floor.
At some point you gotta pick it up and throw it away.
- Want me to look? - Mer's gonna take care of it.
I'm a renowned plastic surgeon.
- Grey's a resident. - She gives me sex.
Especially when I'm wounded.
Oh! Oh...
Is this positioned right?
If I'm getting a mammogram. Lower, to the right.
- Two, what are you doing? - Draping so your parts are safe.
Get away from my parts.
Oh. Gentle, gentle, gentle.
- How are you doing? - Please take my films
'cause my interns are idiots!
How's Mr. Kenner?
- Stable. - You cannot let him die.
- I'm doing my best, hold still. - I am. Just shoot it.
Hold still because I wanna ask you a question.
What?
Did you mean what you said about me and Derek?
Well, this is not fair. I'm impaled.
I know I talk about it too much.
I've gone soft and gooey and disgusting and if I had to listen, I'd puke too.
But you said what you said because you were mad, right?
Not because you meant it?
Just take my X-ray and... It doesn't matter what I say.
Of course it matters what you say!
Of course it matters.
You stop... Oh!
Stop taking my picture, and take my picture!
Anna.
Are you feeling OK?
Her world is about to fall apart and she has no idea.
It's all my fault.
What should I do?
I know I'm a terrible person, but what should I do?
She should hear it from you.
You're her best friend. Even if it's the most terrible thing in the world...
you should tell her.
Hey.
Callie's gonna freeze her patient. Wanna go check it out?
Hello? Alex? Why are you ignoring me?
I'm hoping if I wait long enough
you'll be as annoyed by the sound of your voice as I am and shut up.
OK... Did I do something?
- You know what you did. - No. I don't.
- Alex, just tell me, what did I do? - Shut up.
I had a bad night and cried like a girl.
I'm over it. You need to get over it too.
That chill you'll feel is cold saline
rushing through your veins to lower your core body temperature.
And if it works, I walk?
If it works, the hope is that you walk.
Wow... OK...
I'm getting cold.
His temp's still 96.8. Shall we lay another cooling blanket?
Up to you, Dr. Torres, you're taking point.
That's what the chief of a number one teaching hospital does,
he hand picks talented surgeons and lets them take point. Right, Dr. Bailey?
- Couldn't agree more. - Warm and toasty's what I'm feelin'.
His pulse is falling. Are you sure?
- Down to 52. - It's normal for his pulse to fall.
How much longer do we got?
Not too much longer. You're doing great.
- Keep thinking warm and toasty. - OK. I'm trying.
Good.
Number 12, my ass.
You wanna hear how I cut my hand?
It's a good story.
I am not sure moving in together is a good idea.
OK. Fine.
- Fine? What does that mean? - It means that I know you.
- Didn't believe I'd let you move in? - I believe you believe it.
Look, I'm gonna move very slowly. Baby steps.
No sudden moves. You're like a deer in the woods.
OK, I built the house of candles.
It's unprecedented in the Meredith Chronicles.
- Fine. Let's move in together. - Fine.
Unless you wanna go ahead and get married.
Gotcha. Wanna know where I learned that?
Goes with the story of how I cut my hand.
What did you say to Alex?
I... I didn't say anything.
I just said that I think it's nice that you two are friendly again.
Why can't you mind your own business? I should have never told you.
Can't keep anything to yourself unless it's for Cristina.
Izzie.
- Marriage? - Not funny.
Dr. Bailey.
- Yeah? - Mr. Briar's abdomen is more tender.
I know I'm supposed to get a CT, but if we start the surgery after midnight
he's not covered and we're bankrupting him. I say we skip the CT.
You say? You say? No, you don't say. You ask.
And the answer is we don't skimp on medicine to save money. Get the CT.
Doing great. Giving you more sedative and a paralytic to stop your shivering.
OK. OK.
- We'll need to intubate, Bailey. — Coming down.
One, two and three.
And down.
He's down to 90 degrees. I think that's too low.
- Is that too low? - You did all the research.
I think it's too low.
- Oh, God. - OK, so, what now?
Is this going to resolve? Did they recommend lido or amiodarone?
Dr. Torres?
- Dr. Torres? - He's barely got a pulse.
Uh, should we do CPR?
No! Let's try to avoid jostling Shepherd's spinal decompression
unless absolutely necessary.
- Crap. - His heart is likely to stop.
- Soon. What are you gonna do, Torres? - I don't know.
I don't know.
How is he?
Given him medication to keep his blood pressure up,
but Betty's husband is not as stable as we'd like him to be.
They're freezing Phillip.
Freezing him.
To try to help him walk again. I don't...
They explained it to me very well...
And Betty's having surgery on her brain.
And poor Vincent here is barely hanging on.
- And Michael... - It's all right.
We'll survive. We always do.
I wish he would just look at me.
Sarabeth...
Michael lost his job eight months ago.
- What? - The firm let him go.
He just...
He couldn't bring himself to tell you.
He just felt like such a failure.
What...? I don't...
Why do you... How do you know this?
He told you.
Sarabeth...
Anna...
Have you been sleeping with my husband?
- I'm sorry... - He's in V-fib. Code blue!
Get them out of here, please.
You started him on ECMO? You're taking out his blood and replacing it?
It was the only thing to do. We don't want to jostle his spine.
This'll give his heart rest.
We need you to monitor him until we get him back on. Now are you in or not?
I sent Michael down for the CT.
I was hoping we could start the surgery. Get him in under the wire.
But it's almost midnight, so...
It doesn't matter, I don't care. I don't.
Do you know anything about Betty's husband?
He... I think he was dying. Have you heard anything?
No, I can find out.
Why do men cheat?
My husband slept with my friend.
He lost his job, and then he slept with my friend,
all the while telling me he loves me.
Why?
Maybe he was low.
He was down and he didn't want you to see him like that.
In pain. Weak. As less than a man.
He has his pride so he turned away.
It's not right, but it...
It doesn't mean he doesn't care about you.
I swear it doesn't.
- All right, we all ready to wean? — Let's do it.
It looks like he's tachycardic.
Should we shock him? Give him adenosine?
Normally I'd say yes, but this man's an ice cube.
Torres, in any of your research, was there anything to suggest what to do?
I mean, um... I think I messed up here.
I don't... I don't know. Maybe he would've been fine on his own.
- Maybe... - All right, look at me. Look at me.
Focus. You're trying something new. Nothing wrong with new.
Breaking new ground, pushing boundaries comes with the job.
So, Dr. Torres, take a breath,
stop panicking and just tell us. What did your research say?
My research showed that...
That arrhythmias can occur at a certain threshold.
His appears to be between
- 91.5 and 92 degrees. - He's around 90 right now.
We could use the ECMO to help bring him back up.
Yes, but not too quickly because that can cause problems of its own.
All right, looks like we have some warming to do.
What do you see?
Uh, it kinda looks like it's hitting nothing.
Oh. It looks like it's hitting nothing because it's hitting nothing!
- So what does that mean? - What do you mean,
"What does that mean?" Don't you know how to read an X-ray?
- You always read them. - Oh, get out.
All of you just get out and find me someone with a brain.
Those your interns? Seem pretty scared of you.
I am not scary.
What are you doing?
- That's my icicle. - Yeah.
You took out my icicle.
I didn't give you permission to do that.
So?
Cristina.
He died.
- Patient still alive? - He's stable.
Let some soldier talk you into something that could've killed a man.
- He deserved the chance. - No way of knowing
- if it helped or hurt. - He deserved a chance.
He deserved the best, the most that this hospital could give him.
I've let a lot of things slide over the past few years.
I've been...
- soft - This was not about you being soft.
I think it's the fact that Meredith is here, that Ellis's daughter is here.
Chief...
Vincent Kenner.
We gave him 31 units of blood, fresh frozen plasma,
multiple liters of LR... We did everything we knew to do,
we couldn't bring him back.
You don't know how to do anything.
None of you.
You're halfway through your second year of residency,
and you walk around here like it's your God-given right to be here.
Well, it is not, Dr. Grey, I assure you.
You are here because I allow it.
You are here to do what I say. And the one thing I asked you to do...
- You can't even save... - Richard!
We can't save everybody.
We should try harder.
Michael, Sarabeth is here.
He's a little tired. The CT showed the hematoma's getting worse,
so Dr. Bailey and I will be taking him down to the OR soon.
But he wrote you this letter.
I'm not interested.
"Sarabeth."
Sorry. That wasn't me, that was the letter.
"I know you hate me." Again, not me. The letter.
I'm just gonna read.
Um... "I know you hate me right now.
And you have every right to.
I betrayed you. I betrayed our marriage.
But I had lost my job and I couldn't tell you, so I told Anna instead,
which was wrong and stupid.
I've wanted to tell you a million times. And let you know how truly sorry I am.
But now I have no voice, so I'm begging you, please,
if you could just listen with your heart..." That is so poetic.
That was me, sorry, not him... Sorry.
"If you could just listen with your heart
when I tell you that I know you can't forgive me right now,
but I'm gonna do everything in my power to make it up to you.
But no matter what happens, no matter what you decide to do...
I'm going to love you until the end of time."
That's it. I'm done talking. Well, he's done. He's done. The End.
Betty?
She's not awake, but I can take you to see her.
- And her memory? - We don't know yet.
Oh, no. Oh, please don't say it.
- I'm sorry, Vincent... - Oh, God.
- Oh, God, no. - Very sorry.
- Sarabeth... - Don't, don't, don't. Just... don't.
Sarabeth...
Vincent's dead and Betty...
We don't know if she's gonna be OK,
- and Phil and Michael. - Don't you mention his name to me.
Sarabeth.
More bad things have happened to us today
than have ever happened before.
We've been blessed. Until today.
I took it for it granted. I took you for granted.
We've been friends for 50 years.
Ever since we were little girls.
And I made one awful, awful mistake.
- But I need my best friend. - You slept with my husband...
- Please... - I'm going to go see Betty.
I'm gonna see my friend.
Sorry about teasing Alex.
I forgive you.
Tell me about trauma surgery.
Trauma? Quick and dirty.
No time to make things pretty, and no time for mistakes.
Drop your pants. You need a shot of cefazolin I-M.
No time for mistakes, huh?
So, what, you don't make mistakes?
I make mistakes, people die.
I'm the best surgical resident in my program, and...
Today I killed a man because I couldn't do a stitch.
In the field, you do what you can. Work with what you have.
It's about somethings, not being the best. It's about saving lives.
I make mistakes. Guys die by my hand, good guys.
Guys who are fighting for their country in a desert.
And I don't know everything. Nobody does.
So I make mistakes. And I learn.
And the next time I don't make that mistake again,
so the next guy, that guy? He lives.
Mistakes are how you learn.
Hi, Betty. How are you feeling?
My head...
hurts.
What's going on?
Betty, you and Vincent were in a car accident.
Vincent... I'm so sorry. He didn't make it.
No, no, please. No.
No... He's in the other car, he's gonna be here any minute.
Oh, my head...
It hurts.
What happened?
Well, you look pretty stable, which is good because I can't let you
go into your next surgery until you're feeling strong and stable, OK?
It happens, people make mistakes.
They sleep with the wrong person and they hide it,
but if you ask me it's the part that comes after that matters,
the part where you make it right.
I think you're off to a good start.
Karev. Michael Briar ready for his ex-lap?
- He was ready an hour ago. - And I'm ready now. Book the OR.
Fine.
- Dr. Karev, what time is it? - It's tomorrow.
His insurance expired.
- I'm sorry about the hand. - These things happen.
Not to me they don't.
Or they didn't before you existed for me.
Before you existed, I was good.
Every doctor wanted me in their OR.
I was known as a damn good scrub nurse.
And now I'm the crazy girl out of Fatal Attraction
who goes around stabbing surgeons.
Sorry.
I'm so... I'm sorry.
There's an opening in peds. I start on their service tomorrow.
Again. Very sorry about your hand.
What's...
What am I doing here?
Where's Vincent? Did something happen?
I can't... I can't tell her anymore.
- I won't. - I know.
Why don't you two take a break.
- Check on things. - I don't want her to be alone.
I'll sit with her, I don't mind.
Sarabeth, Anna.
Am I in a hospital?
Oh, honey... There's been an accident.
Where's Vincent? Is he OK?
Your husband is on his way, he'll be here any minute.
- He's on his way now? - Yes.
- Oh. - He's just around the corner.
If you watch the door, you'll see him any minute.
- You'll see him. - Oh, good, he's...
- He's on his way? - He's on his way.
- Around the corner? - Yes. Around the corner.
It's better for her.
Thank you.
Come on, let's go check on our husbands.
Karev, I think that clock is wrong.
I know it says 2:30am,
but I'm pretty sure it's actually only 11:58pm.
- Can you fix it, please? - Set it back?
Set it back.
It's important that the official hospital record shows the right time.
And the insurance company needs it too.
And I say it's only 11:58pm.
Scalpel.
You know, you'd be good in the field.
Now you've got this battle scar, you'd fit right in.
- Right. - I'm serious.
You should ditch this place, go for the adventure.
You telling me this place gives you a rush, a high?
Yeah. Yeah, it does.
Dr. Hunt, there you are.
How's the gash on that leg?
Uh, Dr. Yang took good care of me. Excellent care of me.
I made a few calls. They speak very highly of you at Maryland Shock Trauma.
I also heard a story that you constructed an OR table
from a exploded humvee in the middle of the desert. True?
Had to be innovative in the middle of the desert.
Have to be innovative everywhere.
How would you like a job, Dr. Hunt?
Uh, appreciate the offer, but I'm due to go back to the sandpit.
Finish my tour.
Well, good luck to you.
What?
I... I don't even know you.
So?
It might've been the hypothermia treatment.
- Or my surgical skills. - We'll never know.
What's going on?
Phillip can wiggle his toes.
Say it.
- Don't make me say it. - Please? Say it. Say it for me.
Even though it's technically not true yet.
We made a man walk.
- We made a man walk. - We made a man walk!
What a nice way to wake up.
Did you sleep with Meredith?
Yeah, I did.
Why?
I... I mean... Sorry.
Were you in love with her?
Thought I was.
But I was too scared to admit it.
I did know that she did not like me that way,
and I did it anyway.
And I shouldn't have because...
I'm...
Besides just being so selfish, I...
You know, take advantage of her that way, to want her to want me like that
when clearly she...
Like I said, I made mistakes the last year,
but I'm trying to get back on track.
- I gotta do that by myself. - The only reason I...
I wanted to help...
is because I feel like
you and I are more than just roommates.
We are more than just roommates.
We are?
Yeah, we're friends. I mean, right now, you're probably one of my best friends.
Best friend.
I'm not an experimenter.
I don't like to experiment.
But then you showed up, and we did it together,
and the experiment was kind of a success.
Oh.
Oh!
Look, I've never done this before.
I... I've never kissed a girl.
I'm not sure I even like kissing girls.
I don't, actually, like kissing girls.
I just...
like kissing one girl.
You.
I don't have anything to compare it with.
I... You're the only woman I've ever kissed.
- So you're freaking out too? - A lot of therapy time.
I don't do therapy. I just get all... Ah!
And then I get all clingy, and...
OK, you don't need to know that yet.
So...
Does this... This kind of makes us virgins, doesn't it?
I guess, in a way, it does.
Virgins.
Hey, we can be scared together.
Kind of virgins, and, yeah, we can be scared together.
- OK? - Yeah. Thanks.
You said Derek and I would never make it.
And then I was karmically impaled for saying it.
But you're right.
People don't have happily ever afters,
people barely have ever afters.
So why would Derek and I be any different?
Mer. Why do you care what I think?
Because you're my person.
And if I'm going to do this with him, be whole and healthy.
Be a warm, gooey person who lives with a boy...
I need you. I need you on board.
I need you to cheer me on.
Because you're the only one who knows me...
darkly.
Really knows me.
I need you to pretend that I can do this, even if you don't believe.
Because if you abandon me now I will never make it.
I'll never get my happy ending,
- and that's just... - Life.
I'm saying please here.
I think you and Derek will make it.
You'll make it work.
Are you just telling me what I want to hear?
I am your person.
I'm on your side.
Once upon a time, happily ever after.
The stories we tell are the stuff of dreams.
Fairy tales don't come true.
See? I told you I would show you my dress.
You look better than a bride.
Reality is much stormier.
Much murkier.
Much scarier.
Listen up, people!
Listen up.
We used to be the best surgical program in the West.
An upstart program that no one ever heard of
that blew everyone out the water.
And then, overnight, we got old,
entrenched and sloppy, just like everyone else.
We've been resting on our laurels.
You have all been failing.
Failing to take initiative, failing to ask the tough questions.
Failing to practice your skills.
Failing to give opportunity to practice skills.
And I let it happen.
So you have not failed, we have failed.
Well, it stops. And it stops now.
People sliding over general surgery as though they'll never see anything,
but a heart or a brain through the course of their career.
As though blood from the heart doesn't make its way through the whole body.
Or the nerves don't travel past the brain stem.
It's shoddy teaching, and it makes for shoddy surgeons.
We've failed.
Get it? We all have. And it stops now.
The surgical training protocol is officially changing, people.
The bar has been raised.
Consider yourself on notice.
Reality. It's so much more interesting
than living happily ever after.