1, 2, 3, hyah!
Baby.
Sassy.
Studly.
Mmm!
Check the pecs. Huh! Ha! Huh!
Man, I'm pretty.
Do the monkey with me. Come on.
Hey there, baby. Ooh! Ah!
Yeah, whatever.
Captioning made possible by Turner entertainment group and U.S. department of education
oh, mama.
Millions of chicks at the push of a button.
Hello! I should have tried this Internet thing long ago.
Hey, all you hot mamas,
want to talk to a steamin' hunk of cyber-fella?
Female voice: Wow. Are you really a steamin' hunk?
Johnny: Let's just say I take up a lot of cyberspace.
Oh, wow. We should totally get together.
How's right now?
Right now's perfect.
Huh! Right on.
I am going to hit a homer today.
Hey!
Who's that handsome guy?
Hello, 911 emergency.
There's a handsome guy in my house.
Oh, wait a second. Cancel that.
It's only me.
[Splash]
Oh, you drive me wild!
Hyah!
[Doorbell rings]
Showtime!
Coming!
Hi. You must be Johnny. I'm Carol.
Uh...
You know, it really feels weird
hooking up with someone over the Internet.
Doesn't it feel weird?
Hey, can I use your phone before we go?
Um... Yeah.
Oh, great. Thanks.
You can have some of that if you want.
What?
My salt lick. You can have some.
What about germs?
Oh, you look clean enough.
Now, let's see here.
Shoot!
Oh, well, let's just go.
Can you hand me my purse?
Um...
How about if I pay for dinner?
Oh, wow. Thanks. You're the best.
It is so nice to have a day off.
I work at a real-estate firm, and I...
What are you staring at, Johnny?
Um... Nothing.
Uh!
You know, don't you?
[Sobbing]
They always know!
Oh, now, look here, ma'am.
I don't care if you're an antelope.
You don't?
No. Come on. Let's go get us some chow.
You are such a gentleman.
Yeah, I know.
[Horns honking]
Johnny: Ooh! That was— ooh! Hey!
I think that might—ooh!
I'm sure they have insurance and everything.
Now, don't you think you ought to—oh!
Well, I guess red doesn't always have to mean stop.
These cars are so badly designed.
Look, you want me to drive?
I've got thumbs.
Oh, no, no, no. You're so sweet.
That's ok. I'm fine.
Crazy women antelope drivers!
[Muffled]
Dang! There goes my premium again.
You won't believe what I have to pay for insurance.
Oh, mama.
[Calliope playing]
2 for the carnival, please.
[Sniffs]
Isn't this romantic, Johnny?
This is romantic, Carol.
I agree.
Whoopee! Ride 'em, cowboy!
Yes, sir!
Oh, man, this ain't gonna be pretty.
Hello!
Look, men. It's Pegasus.
No. Wait a second. No, it's not.
May I help you, sir?
Table for 2, please.
I'm sorry, sir.
We only serve humans.
Wait a minute. Aren't you Mike Stevens?
Why, yes.
You went to college with my father.
I— oh, my gosh!
Carol? Oh, wow!
I didn't even recognize—
oh, my goodness! You've gotten so big.
Oh, you say that to all the antelope.
You look great, Mike.
Thanks. You... Well, you look fabulous.
Come on. I'll get you guys a table.
Just keeps getting weirder and weirder.
Thanks, Mike.
Whoops. Well, you know,
that's ok. I'll stand.
So, what can I get you two?
Yeah. I'll have the crab.
Hmm... Um... I'll have some grass.
Just a little, though.
I usually just chew the same bite for hours.
Coming right up.
Let me ask you something, honey.
Why do you want to date a human?
Oh, shoot, Johnny. You're so sweet.
I can't lie to you.
I'm trying to teach my boyfriend a lesson.
He's so possessive.
I'm really sorry, but I'm basically using you
to get back at him.
I hope you don't mind.
Um, no. No, that's cool.
I can deal with that.
Say, he ain't a moose or anything, is he?
Should I be nervous?
You better be nervous!
If I catch you messing around with my Carol,
I'll pinch your trachea shut!
Oh, nat, you're just... Just impossible!
See what you think of this.
That was new.
Oh! You playboy!
Ow! Ow! Hey! Come on now!
Hang on a second, mister!
I'd never lay a hand on your lady.
Why? What's wrong with her?
Nothing. I just—
liar!
Aah!
How about a little static electricity, you jerk?
I never did like shellfish.
Get him, Johnny. Go on, Johnny.
Get him. Get him. Get him, Johnny.
Oh, baby.
Where's Mrs. Paul when you need her?
Aah!
Well, well, what have we here?
A couple of troublemakers, eh?
Uh-oh.
Well, we know a place
where you can make all the trouble you want.
Really?
Oh, Johnny, I just feel awful about this.
I really do.
You know, there's a lesson here.
4-legged chicks are nothing but trouble.
The bottom one's mine! Go near it and die!
Don't you make me step on you, man.
Narrator: In northern Spain
lies the quaint little town of Pamplona,
where, once a year, thousands of people flock
to witness the annual running of the bulls.
Of course, Pamplona has other attractions.
You got that right, mister.
Hey there, Spanish señorita.
Sprechen sie love?
It's her, isn't it? It's not me.
It's her, right?
[Woman screams]
Oh, yeah. When a woman screams,
I just feel the need to be there.
Excuse me, but—
[men shouting]
Wait a minute. Can you—
the bull! The bull!
Bull?
What are they talking about?
Uh-oh.
Yay! Yay! Yay!
[Cheering]
Thank you. Hyah! Thank you very much.
Thank you for caring.
Excuse me, mister, but your zipper's down.
[Zip]
[Sobbing]
I hate men who cry.
Hey, how'd you like to watch the show in 3-d, sweet thing?
Hyah! Hyah! Hyah!
[Yawn]
Excuse me, señor, but you'll be needing this.
Thanks, kid.
What beauty through yonder mirror breaks?
It's me,
and I want to give me to you.
[Woman yawns]
Hey, don't bother me now, kid.
I'm waxing poetic-like, all right?
I said, don't bother...
Me... Man.
Uh, excuse me,
but you and me, we got to fight.
I'm sorry, friend, but violence is not the answer.
I know, but see, like, you got the cape.
So you and me, we got to fight.
I've got nothing against you.
And I got nothing against you,
but you got the cape.
So you and me, we got to fight.
Unless, of course, you're... Chicken.
Chicken?
Come on, mister.
I'll show you who's chicken.
Yay! Yay! Yay!
Would a chicken do this?
Yay! Yay! Yay!
I think not.
Oh!
Oh, man.
Whoa!
Uh!
Somebody wants their big bull butt kicked.
Uh, watch the cuticles, huh, babe?
Ooh... Ooh... Ooh...
Ahh... Ahh... Ahh...
Thank you. Thank you very much.
Ooh... Ooh... Ooh...
Thank you. Thank you very much.
Ooh!
Whoa!
Ooh!
Now... It's personal.
Ah!
Hyah! Thank you. Thank you very much. Hyah!
Hyah! Hyah!
[Cheering]
Yah!
Hee! Ha! Huh! Hey!
Hey! Hee! Ooh! Huh!
Ha! Sizma!
All right, hold it. Hold it.
I got to tell you this, as a friend.
Your shoelace is untied.
Oh. Thanks.
So, then he says to me,
"is that horn loaded?"
Well, I look at him and—
[ring]
Excuse me a minute.
Yo. Talk to me.
Johnny: Mr. bull.
Look behind you.
Ouch.
[Cheering and applause]
Well, I hope you're happy.
Well... Yeah. Why?
Now this bull's going to be eaten
and his hooves turned into ashtrays.
Oh, yodel-a-hee-hoo!
Who's going to turn that nice bull into ashtrays?
They are.
Yay! Yay! Yay!
♪ Oh, won't you come home, bill Bailey? ♪
♪ won't you come home? ♪
hold on a minute.
Hyah! I got an idea.
[Whispering]
♪ I cried the whole night long ♪
♪ I'll do the cooking, honey ♪
♪ I'll pay the rent ♪
♪ I know I done you wrong ♪
hey, everybody, look up there.
¿Que? ¿que? ¿que?
Hop in.
Shotgun!
The bull, he has escaped.
Aww... Aww... Aww...
Ok, who wants to order Chinese?
Bull: ¶ alive, alive-o, alive, alive-o ♪
♪ crying cockles and mussels ♪
♪ alive, alive-o ♪
I'm a powerful Hollywood producer,
and I want to make you a movie star.
You I don't need. Where can I drop you off?
Uh-uh. No way. The kid and I are a team.
Where he goes, I go.
Well, ok, but you're going to be big, baby.
Really big!
Narrator: And so Johnny and the bull
lived happily ever after,
and as the legend goes, if you believe in such things,
they traveled to Hollywood and went on to star
in such major motion pictures as...
And, of course...
Hey, a guy's got to make a living, huh? Hyah!
Man: Hello, Johnny. It's activity time.
There's a rhino hiding somewhere in this room.
Can you find him before the kids at home do?
Hey, no problem.
Excuse me.
Man: Time's up!
Ha ha ha! I'm right here, you big, dumb jerk!
Hey, buddy, you seen any rhinos around here?
I am a tan man.
I am a buttercup.
I'm as sweet as can be.
Please won't you buy some cookies from me?
Listen up, kid. I ain't got the time.
Go on. Bother somebody else with your rhyme.
I'm selling cookies.
Almost free.
Please won't you buy some cookies from me?
Hyah! I'm on a diet. Can't you see? Hyah!
And cookies are very bad for me.
Now go on, kid. Just let me be.
I will not buy any cookies from...
Thee.
Thee?
You wish that you could rhyme like me.
Hyah! Ha! Huh!
Hyah! Huh!
They're not that expensive.
So, why won't you buy?
You must think that I'm a real gullible guy. Hyah!
I don't want no cookies.
They'll turn me to goo.
I'm not going to buy any cookies from you.
Hyah!
Oh!
Beat it, kid. I'm making lunch.
How about some chocolate crispy crunch?
Would you eat them with a fox?
If the fox was courteney Cox.
But since that is not the case,
get that stuff on out my face.
Man, this rhyming stuff really hurts my tongue.
Hopefully it came today—
the thing for which I sent away.
Yeah, it's here.
Now all is well.
My jumbo jug of stud's hair gel.
Johnny, I'm surprised at you.
For this you spent $12.92?
That gel won't do you any good,
but I bet some lemon sprinkles would.
Would you buy a peanut swirl,
even from a little girl?
I will not buy them, not one box.
I will not eat them with a fox,
not with bagels or with lox,
and do not tempt me with courteney Cox.
I will not buy a peanut swirl.
I will not buy it, little girl.
I want no cookies, can't you see?
Now get that stuff away from me!
Aah!
That was close.
A clean escape.
Good thing I am in such great shape.
Hey there, miss. I'm Johnny b.
Want to spend the day with me?
Sure, I will, on one condition.
You help me with my cookie mission.
I will not eat them, not one box.
I will not eat them with a fox,
not a crunch and not a swirl.
I will not buy them, little girl.
I want no cookies, can't you see?
Now go away and let me be.
Hyah!
[Ring]
Hello.
Would you eat them on a dare?
No way, kid. They'll muss my hair.
This place is huge. I'll go inside.
There's lots of places I can hide.
I'm a poet, and I don't know it.
I make a rhyme every time.
Whoa!
This one's big and yummy, too.
I'm really getting sick of you.
Hyah!
Whoa!
I have to say, it's quite a day.
Oh! Oh! Oh! Oh!
Feels as though I hit my head.
Am I alive, or am I dead?
You're alive. Don't be afraid.
These go great with lemonade.
Would you eat them on a boat?
How about in an overcoat?
Ok, Johnny, what do you say?
Will you buy some cookies today?
That's it, kid. I've had enough.
I'm really sick of all this stuff.
I don't want cookies. Can't you see?
Now get your stuff away from me.
I will not buy them, not one box.
I will not eat them with a fox.
I will not buy a peanut swirl.
I will not buy it, little girl.
I will not eat them on a boat, with a goat, or in a coat.
You drive me nuts. It's really true.
I've really had enough of you.
You've got until the count of 3
to go away and let me be!
1!
[Crying]
2.
[Sobbing]
3—ah, hey, kid.
Come on, kid.
Oh, man.
Come on, kid, please don't cry.
If it means that much, I'll buy. I'll buy.
You will?
I didn't mean to make you cry.
I'm really not that bad a guy.
If cookies mean that much to you,
I'll buy a box. No, make that 2.
Oh, thank you, Johnny. You're true-blue.
All folks should have a friend like you.
No big deal, my little scout.
I'm glad that I could help you out.
A buck a box, kid. Here you go.
Give them here, and then you blow.
[Whistles]
[Train whistle blows]
What's with the train, you buttercup, you?
I just wanted 2 boxes, 2 boxes, 2!
You've got your 2 boxes, but let me explain.
There's a reason we're using this great big old train.
See, we pass the savings along right to you.
For your lousy 2 bucks, you get a million plus 2.
Bye-bye, Johnny. Thanks.
♪ LA LA LA LA LA LA LA LA ♪
a million and 2 cookies.
Got milk?
Captioning made possible by Turner entertainment group and U.S. department of education
captioning performed by the national captioning institute, inc.
Public performance of captions prohibited without permission of national captioning institute