Baby.
Sassy.
Good luck.
Check the packs.
Man, I'm pretty.
Do the monkey with me.
Come on.
Hey there, baby.
Yeah, whatever.
Here is a tale of a man we all love.
God's gift to women, sent down from above.
Strutting his stuff, this fine strapping lad has
a streak of good luck that's about to turn bad.
Make way for J.B.
Buffenstock.
One, two, green, four, five, six, seventy, two...
Hey, who turned up the gravity?
Excuse me, can I look into your set?
Sure.
Let me just finish here.
One million, five...
Two billion, six... Ten whole pounds.
Ooh, that's a lot for someone your age.
What?
Ten?
And what do you mean your age?
Let me get that for you, old timer.
Old what?
You might want to put some salve on that.
Ah.
What's she talking about, old?
Why, I'm just as spry and spunky as I've always been.
Did I just say spry and spunky?
Who says spry and spunky anymore?
Isn't he cute?
Oh, yeah.
Work it, Johnny.
Work it.
That is so totally how I'm gonna look when I'm old.
Move it or lose it, I say.
Why, I...
What's happening to me?
Where's my muscles?
Where's my young beefcake's tuddliness?
Where's all the hot chicks waiting in the wings?
How's it going, Mr. Krusty Stat Muffin?
What the...
What the... Oh, it was only a stupid dream.
I'm still young.
Still springtime fresh.
Which is good, seeing as I've got a hot date this afternoon.
Beauty's where you'll find it.
What the...
I did not just see a gray hair on my head.
It has to be a scratch or something on the mirror.
Now let's try this again.
Hey, good looking.
Somebody must have replaced this mirror with a trick mirror.
Gremlins.
Oh, no.
Gremlins must have gotten to this mirror, too.
Wait a second.
Oh, man.
It's for real.
I know how to deal with the likes of you.
Now, let's get that little bad boy, shall we?
No smart aleck hair makes a fool out of Johnny.
This is so not good.
No way, Gray.
Johnny's got a date and I ain't got no time for this nonsense.
And don't come out till you're nice and blond.
Hey, Johnny.
What's with that big, gnarly gray hair?
Ha, ha.
I don't know what you're talking about.
Johnny Bravo is blond.
100% natural Hulk Hogan blond.
Actually, it's more like stone cold gray.
Hi!
Oh, mama, say it ain't so.
Sorry, it's so.
So-so that the glare nearly blinded me from down the street.
Hush, little lady, don't say a word.
Johnny don't need your mocking words.
No mocking.
Helping.
I wanna help you.
I said hush!
I need the silence for the thinking.
I need to find someone who can help me get this gray out.
I can help you.
I know.
I'll just go back in time, collect some hair from me in the past, then come back
to the future and hide the gray hair by gluing the new hair all around it.
Oh, that's great.
Now all I need is a time machine.
Or I could help you.
Do you have a time machine?
No, but I think I have some hair products at my house that could help.
I guess I could try that till I get a time machine.
That's the spirit.
Mmm, that is some good eats.
Shh, I'm not done.
It says here to apply two cups of bacon grease.
Check.
A dash of bean curd.
And a slab of tofutti to troubled area.
Check.
Pour on seeds.
Next, work into the scalp with three screeching monkeys.
Three screeching what?
Oh, mama.
Perfect.
Next, we've got to place it in a nylon setting.
I wonder if Brad Pitt has to do this.
And eat for 20 minutes.
Now, for the great unveiling.
Voila!
Not a gray hair on your heady head.
Ha!
Hey!
This is the last time I listen to you.
I'm still a strapping hip hipster.
I ain't letting no gray ruin my day.
I'm taking my feisty gray friend out on the town, and
we're gonna meet up with my sweet little Chinchica.
Go get her, Johnny!
He doesn't stand a chance.
Well, hello, little lady.
You waiting for a young stud?
Why, yes, I am.
But I think he stood me up, cause I don't see him anywhere.
Well, look no further, pretty mama, cause Johnny Bravo has arrived.
Oh, you must be Johnny Bravo's senior.
What?
Oh, that's a funny joke, Mr. Bravo, sir.
Is Johnny running late?
Cause I'm happy to wait for him.
No, I'm Johnny Bravo.
The one, the only, the younger, not the elder.
Gosh, sir, don't get me wrong.
You look great for your age, but I really don't go for the whole grandpa thing.
I'm no grandpa.
Just look at these biceps.
And look, I can pick you and this bench up.
Don't worry, Mr. Bravo.
Just tell Johnny to call me when he's free.
Ta-ta!
Oh, damn mammoth.
I guess I am old.
Look at Johnny.
He's an old man now.
He's older than a cow.
Gray man Johnny.
See the old man in me.
The old man of the sea.
Can't sort it.
He's an old dude.
Now he's leaving.
Goodbye, old guy.
Hey, buddy.
Care for a game of chess?
Shuffleboard?
Hey, come on in.
You're just in time for the early bird senior discount breakfast.
Breakfast?
Kind of birding?
Care to taking a picture?
The theater down the block has a great senior discount.
Well, I'll be.
Don't mind if I do.
That was a knee slapper.
You're darn tootin'.
Oh, my back.
Here, take my cane.
No.
No, I couldn't.
Oh, heck, I got plenty.
The hospitals hand them out like candy, don't you know?
Why, thank you.
I'm much obliged.
Best be heading home now.
Wow, this old man stuff ain't as bad as I thought it would be.
Hello, little lady.
Going my way?
Why, yes.
Oh, girls.
Say goodbye to the old man, girls.
Goodbye, old man.
At least I still have my memory.
Hey, buddy, are these your teeth?
Somebody forgot them back at the coffee shop.
Yeah, it wouldn't surprise me.
Ah, where does the time go?
Johnny, what happened to you?
I got a gray hair.
Now I'm old.
The end.
Can you rub my feet, mama?
Gray hair?
You mean that little thing?
Oh, Johnny, don't you know gray hairs only come from worrying?
Now, what in the world could your pretty little head be worried about, huh?
Well, I did have this awful dream that I was old and... Wait!
Stop right there.
Now that is something you don't ever have to worry about.
You, Johnny Bravo, are my baby.
And being my baby, you will never be old and will always
be the most beautiful man in the whole wide world.
And then something funny did happen that day.
His gray hair did grow three times blonder, some say.
So Johnny got up and he went out the door.
Living life fully blonde, his gray hair no more.
You can never have enough blow dryers, I always say.
Oh, I thought you said this would only take a minute.
Johnny, when did you learn to tell time?
Hey, the latest issue of Where's Wally?
I just love looking for Wally.
And it's the swimsuit issue.
Hot dog!
What's this?
The Abdominator?
A righteous six-pack or double your money back.
Yeah, right.
There's Wally.
Now where are those swimsuits?
Shampoo, cream rinse, rubber baby bubble bath, and the magazine.
Huh?
Oh, yeah.
Bingo!
Mmm, polka-Dottie.
How.
far away is Tahiti?
What do you mean, Mama?
Whoa, Mama!
What have you been doing?
You look great.
Oh, thank you.
I mean, we go to the store, and you come back a whole new you.
Wow, thanks.
Didn't I see you at the Makeup Mega Mart?
Seriously, it's like when Bruce Banner turns into the Hulk.
Except you're not green and ugly.
And who are you again?
What do you mean, who am I?
I'm Johnny, your special little boy.
Well, of course you're special, Johnny.
So I guess the store has door-to-door service.
Who knew?
Well then, should you be helping me unpack my stuff?
Oh, sure thing, new and improved, Mama.
Who's he?
Johnny, from the Triple M.
Who's he?
Jimmy, my son.
You had another kid?
When did this happen?
Oh, like ten years ago.
Ten years?
Oh, man, I gotta pay more attention.
I can't believe I have a little brother.
Wow, I always wanted a big brother.
Mom, can Johnny stay and play?
I guess, if it's all right with him.
Don't you have to get back to the Triple M?
Totally random.
Lunch lady surprise.
When I look into your eye-eyes.
Lunch lady surprise!
Oh, yeah!
Hi, Susie.
Now be a honey and carry in the rest of the bags, would you?
Uh, sure, Mrs. Bravo.
Oh, I didn't mean you, dear.
Who did you mean, then?
Well, Johnny, of course.
Johnny?
Where's Johnny?
In the car!
Johnny's not in the car.
Johnny's not in the ca-.
How long has your boy been missing, Mrs. Bravo?
About six minutes!
Ah, good golly.
Bring out the crime dog!
This is Snuffles, the crime dog.
Hi, Snuffles!
Yes, yes, yes.
Try to be calm, Mrs. Bravo.
Do you have anything of Johnny's that the dog could smell?
Like an article of clothing?
His comb!
Snuffles?
Oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh.
Oh, all right.
Is he okay?
Yes, ma'am.
He's just weird like that.
Okay, I got it.
Come on, Johnny.
I'll show you my baseball card collection.
Hey, what did you do to my room?
All my stuff's different.
What do you mean?
Where's my autographed Farrah Fawcett poster?
And my lava lamp?
And where's my barbells?
They're not here because it's my room?
Oh, so now it's your room.
You know, I don't remember saying I'd share it with you.
It's not fair.
Mama!
Listen, Johnny.
If you're gonna be my big brother, let's try and get along.
Please?
Please what?
Do something a big brother would do.
Like... Play baseball with me.
Okay, Johnny boy.
Put some pepper on it.
Give me all you got.
Come on, pitch it.
Quit trying to boss me around.
Oh, man.
Little brothers are a pain.
Okay.
You asked for it.
And the home crowd goes wild.
How about we play something else?
I know.
Wheelbarrow races.
We won!
Okay, switch.
We won again!
Oh!
Okay, Johnny.
Now do a double can opener jackknife corkscrew!
Quit telling me what to do!
Cannonball!
Oh!
Oh, mama.
Dude!
That was extreme!
Wow!
How cool was that?
Hey, can we go play some more baseball?
I got a better idea.
We'll say we watch baseball on TV.
We're ready to go now, boy!
Oh!
All right, Snuffles.
But I'm getting low on dog biscuits.
Oh,
please, officer.
My boy has been kidnapped!
For heaven's sake, can't he hurry up a bit?
No, ma'am.
I'm afraid he can't.
Don't worry, Johnny!
We're coming!
Hey!
This isn't baseball.
It's kung fu bay watching chicks.
I thought you said we were gonna watch baseball.
Huh?
Oh, I didn't say baseball.
I said beach ball.
See?
They're playing beach ball.
Watch and learn, kid.
Hey!
Who's that little girl at the window?
There he is!
There's Johnny Bravo!
Oh, man, it's that annoying little kid from next door.
Quick, we gotta hide!
What annoying little kid from next door?
Come on, kid!
It's kinda stuffy in here, Johnny.
And dusty.
Yeah, well, whatever you do, don't make a sound or she... Shoo!
Gesundheit!
Thank you.
What the... Help!
Oh, man.
So you're our neighbor?
Susie.
My name is Susie.
And you, Johnny.
You had us so worried.
Your mama and the police are downstairs looking everywhere for you.
That's weird.
I've been home the whole time playing with my little brother here.
But your mama says you were kidnapped.
Kidnapped?
Jimmy, how could you?
You were like a brother to me.
Come on, Johnny.
Let's go find your mama.
She'll help us work this out.
Yeah.
Find mama.
But he just followed me home.
I thought he was like the bag boy.
Mama?
I'm completely confused.
Now there's two mamas.
Johnny?
Mama!
Johnny!
I was so worried!
Sorry, lady.
I thought you were my mama.
You thought I looked like her?
Another job well done, boy.
Oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh.
Nope.
All out of dog biscuits.
Sorry.
Oh, that's a dirty, rotten, no-good razzle-frazzle.
What's with the weird dog?
Well, the important thing is you're safe.
Let's go home.
Mama, before we leave, I want to give a fond farewell to my new made-up mom and
fake little brother and tell you how special...
Or not.
Whatever.
Hey, mama, what do you say we make some hot foot sundaes?
With chocolate sprinkles?
And peanut butter and marshmallows!
Oh, it's good to be home.
Like, what?
Yeahh.
Guys, come here.