Aw, yeah.
Listen to that engine purr!
Thanks to the cart, we picked up this manure in record time.
Yeah, dude.
With this cart, there's no lame job Benson can give us
that we can't handle.
Hey, speaking of jobs, we're late for that staff meeting.
Punch it.
Whooooooooo!
Oh, look who decided to show up.
Sorry, Benson.
As I was saying, I crunched the numbers
and the park has extra money this year.
Mordecai and Rigby, you can take this hunk of junk to the dump.
Whuh? - 'Cause I bought us this.
Say guten tag to the Smarten Karten.
Guten tag.
What?
Dde!
Ooooh!
Modern, sophisticated, powerful.
These are three adjectives used to describe this miracle of German engineering.
Whoa! This thing has 100 horsepower!
A device that holds beverages.
No way!
A butt warmer!
Ahh.
Who needs all that stuff?
Here are a few words to describe the Cart.
Reliable, uh, classic...
- Ugh! Ugh!
Won't smell like manure later.
These seats are vintage simulated vinyl.
And look at these classic details.
Those are stickers.
Dude, Benson, the cart's been at the park forever.
It's like a member of the family.
It's the eighth worker of the park.
That cart's engine is on its last legs.
It's releasing noxious gas fumes into the air.
We're not taking Muscle Man to the dump,
and he releases noxious fumes all the time!
No! He's not worth it.
Guys, guys.
I know you had a lot of good times in that cart.
But it's not cost-effective.
Who's gonna pay the bills for it?
We'll pay them.
So, you'll pay the gas bill?
Done.
And the repair bills.
Not to mention insurance, tags, and the occasional tetanus shot.
Pfff!
Okay.
Uh...
$2,000?
That's right.
Paid in full every month for the rest of your life.
You've made your point.
Now take that cart to the dump by the end of the day
or you're fired!
We better get going to the dump.
It's not fair, man.
It's not fair to the cart!
Dude, I love the cart, too, but we can't afford to keep it.
Now, let's pour one out on the hood for old cart's sake.
Word.
Huh?
Whoa.
Is this what it's like to be conscious?
How is this possible?
Whoa!
This is awesome!
I am happy, also, entity Mordecai and entity Rigby.
Dude, you know us.
Call us Mordecai and Rigby.
Don't you have a name?
Well, according to the writing on my insides, it's "Hecho."
"Hecho en Mexico."
We'll just call you "Cart."
Wow! My first nickname!
A lot of good that'll do me now that you have to take me to the dump.
I've only been alive 30 seconds,
and I already know that life is cruel.
And to think, I've still never felt the delicate touch of a lady cart.
I can't stand it!
Cart, you deserve better than this.
Before you go to the dump, we'll take you to experience
all the things you never got to do!
Wow. You'd do that?
For old Cart's sake?
Yeah, dude, for old Cart's sake.
Mm-hmm. Mm-hmm. Mm-hmm. Mm-hmm.
So, what do you want to do first, Cart?
Well...
Whoa!
Whoo!
I got to say, Cart, you're a pretty cool guy.
Right back at you, bro-decai.
Mordecai, Rigby, are you there?
Dude, dude, answer in a French accent!
What? No way!
Hey, Benson.
Wait, wait, wait.
Tell him we just picked up his mama.
Dude, shut up!
You guys were due back hours ago!
Sorry, we...
I don't care!
Get back here or you're fired!
All right.
We better head to the dump.
Where's Cart?
Aw, what?
Did he ditch us?
Oh, no!
This is just like that time Benson had us take care of his dog,
then we took the dog to Cheezers, and then the dog ran away!
Wait. There he is.
Cart, what are you doing?
Sorry, guys. I was just throwing away our trash.
Kind of like how you're gonna throw me away.
You know, at the dump.
Come on, Cart. It's not like that.
Is that all I am?
Just a used-up, old taco wrapper?
You know what would make me feel better?
What? - If I could get a view of the sunset.
Yeah! That sunset is prime send-off material!
Let's go-o-o-o-o-o-o!
I don't know.
Come on, buddy.
Just one more drive, for old Cart's sake?
I can't say no to that face.
Wow. It's magnificent.
Just seeing such beauty gives meaning to my short life.
And even shorter life as a sentient being.
I really feel at peace.
That's great, dude.
All right. Let's get going.
Y-you know, I've never been to a-a-a car wash!
Yeah.
But we washed you all the time!
No, I mean a real car wash.
Look, I know you wouldn't understand because you aren't a golf cart,
but I don't want to go without experiencing this.
But we'll get soaked.
Yeah?
Well, I'm getting crushed.
Seems like the least you could do, with me being crushed and all.
Thanks so much, guys.
It really means a lot to me.
And now that I'm clean, I'm ready for my final wish.
Aw, what?
You said the last thing was the last thing.
I promise, this is it.
One last wish, for old Cart's sake.
Okay, fine. But that's it.
Nice!
Let's go-o-o-o-o-o!
Where to, exactly?
You'll see.
Seriously, you dudes are gonna love this.
"Family Restaurant"?
Why is everything in quotes?
Hey! I asked for the dressing separate!
Separate!
Take it up with the complaints department right here.
Puppies!
- Kittens! - Puppies!
Kittens!
Hey, you gonna order something?
Engine oil. Black.
Ooh. I get it.
Oil's on me.
Dude, you should have just told us you wanted a final oil change.
Hey, don't you know that grade of oil causes unnecessary wear and tear on your engine?
Well, maybe I got a death wish, pal.
Junkers like you should be taken to the dump.
You make me want to puke.
You got your last drink.
Let's hurry to the dump.
It's getting late.
Oh, this?
This isn't the last thing.
Huh? Then what is it?
Watch this.
I've always wanted to get into a fight!
Huh?
Aah!
Them's fighting words!
Ow!
Hey!
I hate this music!
Whoa!
Who wants some?
Cart!
Hey.
Aaaaargh!
And stay out!
Oof!
This is a decent "family establishment."
Don't need you "lowlifes" messing things up.
Wait a minute.
Where's the Cart?
I knew it! He ditched us!
We should have taken him to the dump when we had the chance.
We're so fired, dude.
Mordecai, look!
An oil trail!
There he is!
Cart, what are you doing up here?
I-I'm so sorry, you guys.
I-I just didn't want you to have to see me like this.
It's all right, dude.
Can we please just go to the dump now?
If I have to go, I'm gonna do it my way.
I want to be sent off this cliff
into the ocean filled with fireworks from a third-world country.
To go out in a blaze of glory.
That's my final, final wish.
That's the coolest thing I've ever heard.
All right, that's the last of them.
Thanks, you guys.
Do you have any regrets?
Well, I never did write that novel,
but I've seen things other carts wouldn't believe.
I've started an all-out brawl at a family restaurant.
I've watched sunbeams shimmer over the city from the highest parking ramp.
My only regret is that I couldn't hold more fireworks.
Yeah, but it's still a lot.
Yeah, it is!
Wh-o-o-o-o-o-oa!
Let's get this show on the road.
Good luck, old friend.
Coolest decommission ever.
Totally cool!
Mordecai. Rigby. - Hello?
There's been an accounting error.
I forgot to carry a zero, and it turns out we can't afford the new cart.
And the seat warmer gave Muscle Man third-degree burns
on 70% of his butt.
We need you to bring the old cart back.
I bet you two are glad to hear that.
You know, it wasn't such a bad, old cart after all.
Mordecai and Rigby, did you get all that?