- And now back to "The Kelpbed Kids."
- "The Kelpbed Kids" are hilarious.
High four!
- Wonder why it's in black and white.
- It's a "artistical" choice.
- All right, Kelpbed Kids.
Youse gonna spill the beans
about where you hide all your candy
in this here clubhouse or else!
- Not to you, Ajax.
- We'll never tell you that it's in the cabinet.
Oh. Sorry, gang.
- Hey, Patrick, don't the Kelpbed Kids
kinda look like people we know?
- I don't know any people we know.
Hmm. Eee!
- Oh-ho-ho-ho. The cabinet, you say.
Aha!
Hoops?
Hi, Ajax.
- It's empty.
I'm gonna give everyone here
and their old man a knuckle sandwich.
- Oh boy! With cheese?
- With cheese.
- Oh, no you don't, you dizzy ding dong.
Hwah!
- Huh?
Whuh?
- Hey, what gives? Let me go.
- You just got hooped.
Hoops, Hoops, Hoops, Hoops!
- That settles it.
Hoops is our favorite Kelpbed Kid.
Let's get out our official Hoops hoops
that I bought on SeaBay.
- Way ahead of ya, pally.
- Gah! - Hey, mine shrunk.
- Oh, no, Patrick. It's adjustable.
Who says a hoop has to be round?
- Oh, yeah. There's a relaxed-fit button.
Ah.
- Someone wrote all over my hula hoop.
- Hey, there's an address printed on here.
And it's in Bikini Bottom.
Do you think it's where Hoops lives?
Could we? Should we?
- Ring his doorbell and run away?
- No. - Toilet-paper his house?
- No. - Switch out
his regular for decaf?
- No. We can meet him.
- Gotcha.
We can meet him, then toilet-paper his house.
He's gonna need it after the coffee.
- This is it— where Hoops lives.
- It's a palace.
- I'm too nervous to knock. We don't really know him.
What if he's one of those suffering artist types
who are into witchcraft?
- Or what if he's a cannibal and wants to eat us?
- What if he's a cannibal and doesn't want to eat us?
- We couldn't live with the shame.
Oh, shh!
Run!
- Old Man Walker?
What's he doing in Hoops' house?
Maybe we got the wrong house.
- Oh. - Oh.
He's sad that he got no mail.
That's 'cause I got it.
- It's addressed to Hoops. This is the right place.
- Whoa.
The whole house is filled with "Kelpbed Kid" stuff.
- It's just like being in the show.
Come on in. - Don't mind if I do.
What's happening?
Is that Hoops?
- Uh, no. It's Old Man Walker again.
Remember? From the mailbox?
Oh, yeah.
- Hooligans! Swindlers! Letter looters!
- Oh, we didn't mean any harm!
We just wanted to meet Hoops.
We're fans. - We love Hoops!
- Huh? Hoops?
Why didn't you say so?
I'm Hoops!
- Okay, old man.
- Uh, I hate to break it to you,
but Hoops is a little kid.
- Yup, I was Hoops when I was a little kid,
many years ago.
- You're telling me there have been many years?
I don't believe it.
- Yes, it was in the past.
- I think you're trying to "past" one over on us.
- "Past" one over.
I don't get it.
- Huh? What are you, a couple of dizzy ding dongs?
- Hey, he said Hoops' catchphrase.
"Ya dizzy ding dongs."
- Ya dizzy ding dongs.
- Patrick, "Old Man" Walker is Hoops!
He just kinda, sorta, decayed.
Hoops!
We love you! - Oh!
You're breaking my bones.
- Hey, he's got a new catchphrase.
- What was that? - Was that my heart?
- Uh, no, it was outside.
- Huh? My heart's outside?
Oh, not again.
- Aah!
- Ow! - Yum.
- Dagnabbit, it's that ruffian, Ajax McGee.
- Ajax? Isn't he the mean kid in "The Kelpbed Kids" show?
- He was.
Now he's the mean adult
at Shady Shoals Retirement Home.
Oh!
- That's what you get for being a Kelpbed Kid,
Hoops the Poops.
- [gulps, laughs] Hoops the Poops.
Classic.
Hey, I just had an idea. Revenge.
Let's get back at Ajax, like in one of your episodes.
- Huh, episodes?
Yeah, at my age, I have a lot of episodes.
Who wants pudding? - I do!
- Hold that pudding.
We can build our own tank,
and we'll gather material "The Kelpbed Kids" way.
- Eh, the what bed who—wait, what?
Classic Hoops.
- Huh?
Ah!
- Hmm?
- We're coming for you, Ajax McGee!
- Say hello to my Meanie Mangler!
- Here we are, Hoops. Shady Shoals.
Now call out for Ajax.
- Eh? Huh? Who am I calling?
- Talk into this. - Hello, operator?
This is Barracuda 4117.
Is my prescription ready yet?
- 23 Skiddoo.
Hey, where did you get that pile of junk?
Never mind, I don't care. Have some eggs!
- Whoa! Prepare cannon.
Fire!
- Huh?
- Uh, you loaded the cannon with toast?
- I always have toast with eggs.
- Deploying salt lick.
Engaging sea cow.
- Eugh. Ooh. Ew. Ugh.
Your tongue is so rough!
- Huh? - Hmm?
- Whoa!
Whoa, whoa! Aah! Everything smells like toast!
- Aah!
- Look, there goes Ajax.
- I'll get youse next time!
- Say my name. I'm Hoops the Poops.
- Classic.
Best "Kelpbed Kids" adventure ever!
High four!
- Oops. Uh... - Aah!
- Just call me Hoops the Oops.
- Okay, okay, one at a time.
Krabby Patty! - Krabby Patty!
- Krabby Patty, up!
- Krabby Patty! - Krabby Patty!
- Krabby Patty, up!
- Meep, meep.
- Oh, all this meeping is gonna drive me cuckoo, Mr. Krabs.
- All these meeps are paying your salary.
Meeps are money. - Krabby Patty!
- Krabby Patty, up!
- Wait, someone ordered a Krabby Patty to-go.
Who ordered a Krabby Patty to-go?
Whoa!
Wait, whose order is this?
Whoa. Okay.
Pardon me, did someone order a Krabby—
Oh, um, my bad. I meant meep, meep.
- Oh, meep.
Meep, meep.
- Meep.
Oh boy, ice meep.
Yeah.
Real meep, daddy-o.
Bouncy, bouncy! Bouncy, bouncy, bouncy!
I love to meep.
- Meep, meep!
- Meep!
Meep, meep, meep. Meep, meep, meep.
Meep?
Meep, meep, meep.
- Hey, SpongeBob.
These palms are ready to play some serious patty-cake.
- Meep.
- And you can't play patty-cake
without cake. - Meep!
- Patty-cake, patty-cake. - Meep-meep-meep, meep-meep—
- Baker's man, I'll eat the cake as fast as I can.
Mama called the doctor, and the doctor said,
"No more patty-cakes jumping on the bed."
Meep, meep, meep. Meep, meep, meep.
- Meep, meep mah-meep, meep, meep, meep, meep, meep.
- Meep, meep, meep. - Mailman!
- Meep.
- Morning, SpongeBob. Morning, Patrick.
No!
- It's about time, SpongeBob.
LateBob is more like it.
Ha, LateBob. [laughs, snorts]
- When you're done snorting,
I'd like to order a Krabby Patty.
- Okay, hold on.
- One Krabby Patty, SpongeBob.
- Meep, meep. - Meep, meep.
Meep, meep, meep. Meep.
Meep, meep, meep, meep, meep, meep, meep, meep.
Meep. - Meep.
- SpongeBob, stop that meeping.
What do you think you are? An anchovy?
- Oof! - I hear money meeps.
Are the anchovies back?
- It's SpongeBob.
- SpongeBob!
What in the barnacles is going on here?
- Oh, di-doo. Oh.
Huh?
- [growls, barks]
- Step aside and let my precious Fifi pass,
or I will be offended.
Oh!
Meep? Meep!
- Huh?
It's a stamp-meep!
Phew.
Meep. Meep, meep, meep.
- Bob Gale Doppler, with the big weather.
And I'd like to report it's sunny skies for Bikini Bottom.
But not today, cause there's a storm warning coming at ya.
We got a gust of faux-chovies coming in from the southwest.
Now with a closer look, here's our man on the street,
Rube Goldfish.
- Thanks, Gale.
I'm here with the faux-chovies
that are causing all this meep-abaloo.
Now I just have to ask the question
everyone wants to know.
What in the world does "meep" mean?
Ameeping.
- Haha, thanks Rube.
So if you don't wanna turn into an anchovy today,
you're advised to stay indoors
until that faux-chovy pressure system moves away.
Ha ha.
Huh? Whoa!
Ha ha, meep.
- Ah. And now it's Squiddy time.
Hoo! Ha ha, mm.
When the customers fizzle,
the octopus will sizzle.
Ha, yeah.
Meep, meep! Dinner, dinner.
Meep, meep. Dinner, dinner. - Whoa!
SpongeBob and Mr. Krabs are faux-chovies?
- Meep, meep.
- Okay, okay. Slow down.
One Krabby Patty, one Krabby Patty,
one Krabby Patty.
- Meep.
- Whoever wants a Krabby Patty, raise your hand.
I can't hear your meeping with these headphones on.
Thank Neptune. Aah!
No!
No! Not my headphones!
The meeps. I can hear the horrible meeps.
Meep, meep, hungry.
- More meeps?
Meep.
Anchovy rumble!
Meep. Meep.
Meep. Argh!
- Meep. - Meep.
- Meeeeep.
- My bad. I meant meep, meep.
- Oh, meep.
- Meep, meep! I thought that was you.
- The whole world has gone insane!
I can't take it anymore.
That is the last meep!
- Serba's World of Pizza. What do you want?
- I'd like an extra, extra, extra large pizza
sent to the Krusty Krab as soon as possible.
- Hey, you want-a a pizza as soon-a as possible,
you got it, Calimaro.
- Aah! Ha.
Nobody's turning me into a faux-chovy.
- Pizza delivery.
Huh?
Pizza?
Mmm.
- Mmm, that smells good.
Huh?
Oh! - Phew.
I thought we'd never snap out of that faux-chovy thing.
- Sorry, Mr. Krabs.
I didn't realize how easy it is to get swept up
into a meep mentality.
- It's not your fault, boy-o.
We're just lucky that pizza is the anchovies' natural enemy.
- Yeah, whoever ordered that pie saved our lives.
- And we shouldn't let it go to waste.
It's still hot. - Oh-ho-ho!
Gah!
What? No anchovies?
- All that meeping made me hungry too.
Mr. Squidward, we need some paper plates out here.
- Squidward? Uh, are you here?
- Now just where is that lazy bum
while all this is going on?
- ... Meep.